I can’t help it, he’s the love of my life 💙

I know I’ve written about my husband before but this man deserves to be bragged on. He’s literally fed me when I couldn’t feed myself, helped me learn to walk again & calmed me down when I’d get overwhelmed. This man has shown so much patience & love the past year it just blows me away.

There are 2 people that have been there for me every single day through this journey & it’s been my mama & my husband. Couldn’t fathom going through this without them 2 & their constant love & support.

It’s been so comforting to know he would drop anything just to help me when I need him because I know he’ll do that with our son too. I have no doubt in the world he’s gonna be a great father because he’s been a great husband.

I still can’t believe it’s already been almost 2 years since we said “I do”. Time sure does fly when you’re having fun.

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Miracle Baby 👶🏻 💙

It’s so crazy to think that this was me a year ago. I was in a wheelchair, could barely feed myself because the tremors in my hands were so bad, & looking back now at videos of my speech then is crazy because there were some words that I couldn’t even understand.

The doctors had me on all kinds of medications from the swelling in my brain to the depression pills I was on, at the time I thought kids would be out of the question, especially so soon.

But here I am now, out of the wheelchair, able to feed myself, my speech getting way more understandable & 6 months pregnant with our little miracle baby.

He really is a miracle baby. The doctors didn’t even expect me to live much less have a baby boy on the way a year later. When I told my neurologist I was pregnant, she was so shocked.

If that isn’t God at work than i don’t know what is. It’s still so crazy to me! Think about it, a year ago I couldn’t even walk & now I’m pregnant. Mind blown 🤯

My family needed this little miracle too. We’ve been through a lot this past year I believe this was God saying “Here, take this little bundle of joy.” It was no coincidence either that the moment I started getting content with my recovery is the exact moment I found out I was pregnant. I believe that was God saying He’s not finished with me yet.

So when I feel like giving up, I just look down at belly at my little miracle baby. My little rainbow baby. Because I know that’s God’s promise to me that the storm WILL end. That better days are coming. That my son is counting on me to get better & THAT is what keeps me going.

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My Weekend 🌷

Sorry I haven’t posted in a week. My husband has the weekends off so he gets my undivided attention when he’s home [when I’m awake] & then I got sick 🤧

But here’s what’s been up with us this past weekend.

Not much really lol believe it or not we’re pretty boring people. We attempted to take my maternity pictures but the mosquitoes were terrible so we only got to take a few before we left.

Those are literally the only two pictures I got & I had so many cute poses picked out. But I think my husband wants to take some more so hopefully we can do that.

My husband had the cutest idea of me wearing my Cubs jersey & taking pictures on the field. If you don’t know already, I’m kind of a HUGE Cubs fan!

Well that’s really all we did this past week lol I told y’all we’re pretty boring people. Especially now that I’m pregnant, I like my husband [sometimes] [kinda kidding, kinda not] 😂 & my bed now & that’s pretty much it.

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The Best Is Yet To Come

So dealing with this sickness that I have, I know first hand how hard it is to keep your faith while you’re down. Until yesterday when I heard God’s Not Done With You by Tauren Wells on KLOVE & it really challenged my perspective.

You see, at the beginning of all of this, it was so hard to see passed all of my questions. I was so healthy & in shape 2 years ago, so I never understood why me. It’s still so hard to this day not to get up & go for a run whenever I want to. At the beginning, after going from going for runs whenever I wanted to to not being able to walk was really hard for me. It still is, but through all of this, I’ve learned my place.

Instead of looking at it as “why me” I now see it as an opportunity to share my testimony to y’all. How could I possibly be mad at God when He’s giving us a perfect baby boy? Truth is, I can’t. Yeah it absolutely sucks relearning how to do everything, but maybe this is God’s way of preparing me for motherhood. (Currently have tears streaming down my face). It’s crazy to think about, but it’s the truth.

So anyone going through something, don’t ever question God’s plans because He’s not done with you. Take it from me, I know it’s hard to see it now, but the best is yet to come.

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Learning to Drive Again 🚗

Disclaimer: my teeth aren’t this yellow it was just my husband’s editing 😂

In my last blog post, I talked about my future goals but I forgot to mention driving (pregnancy brain). I miss being able to drive myself without having to depend on everyone else. I miss just wanting some coffee or a Vanilla Coke & driving to Starbucks or Sonic. I miss going to visit family without having to ask.

But now I’m driven everywhere. I have to ask permission & wait for that person to get ready. I have to ask permission just to go get a drink or to go visit family.

My goal is to relearn to drive by the end of the year. I’m gonna have a baby soon & I wanna take him places without having to ask. All I really need to work on is turning & braking. With the coordination my braking is really jerky & so is my turning. Instead of all of that, I just need to work on my confidence. So here’s a little vlog my husband made of me driving yesterday, hope y’all enjoy. 🙂

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My Future Goals

The one thing I enjoyed doing the most & can’t wait to get back to it is calligraphy. Before I got sick, my goal was to start my own business doing like invitations & signs & stuff. That’s still my goal, it’s just gonna take longer than I intended. I would practice all the time & I enjoyed every second of it! I would do bible journaling too, which is just picking out a verse of the chapter I was reading & drawing it on the side of the page.

Another one of my goals is to get back in the gym! Before I got sick, I was a personal trainer at a place called Firm Training Programs & that was honestly the best job I’ve ever had! We taught hiit classes which mean high intensity interval training. I taught the afternoon classes so I would go in before work & get my workout in. Best shape I’ve ever been in & I was a college athlete. So if you’re serious about your fitness journey, if you’re in Midland or Odessa, go check out Firm Training. They have beginner workouts all the way to expert workouts.

Another thing I really want to do is graduate with my bachelors in psychology! I’m only 3 classes away so the goal is to do it before our son gets here. & after all of this, I wanna get my masters in physical therapy but that’s gonna take a little longer. Good thing is, i go to therapy twice a week so I’ve been learning a lot just from that.

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My Husband is the Best 💕

So by now you all know everything I’ve been through in the past year, but what y’all don’t know is my husband has been absolutely amazing through all of this!

We got married September 23, 2017 & I got sick January 26, 2018 so we only had 5 months of a normal marriage. Crazy right?! But what’s been even crazier is that he’s been right here by my side through everything, & now we have a sweet baby boy on the way!

Here’s proof. I’m trying to relearn to walk again & my husband is in the front guiding the walker. He’s been there literally & figuratively every step of the way & I couldn’t be more thankful because most guys would have split the second I got sick.

Now he tries to get my confidence up every chance he gets. We go on walks every evening before the sun goes down & the other day, he told me to walk up our steep driveway by myself & he was right there behind me cheering me on all the way! “Shift your weight”, “don’t stop you’re almost there”, just saying all the right words. When we go out in public like to the grocery store or something, he doesn’t let me hold onto him for balance, he makes me do it by myself, when I’m not being grumpy which is more often than not now because of the pregnancy 😂

I guess what I’m trying to say is, for all you single girls out there, the right guy is totally worth the wait & I truly believe that my husband & I are living, breathing proof of that. No, as much as I like to think he is, my husband is not perfect. But he was right there on my darkest days & he’s still right there when I need him to be. Things are obviously easier than they were a year ago but not nearly as easy as they were before I got sick, I still have to depend on him a lot but that’s just it. He makes it easier for me KNOWING I can trust him to be there when I need him. & that’s how I know he’s gonna be the best daddy. Because if he can be all of that for me, I can only imagine how he’s gonna be with our son.

Funny story time! Our first date makes me laugh every time I think about it, poor guy 😂 So he picked me up from my dorm room & we were just gonna drive around & talk. Not even like 2 miles from the college, his tire popped. We pulled over because he had a spare tire in the trunk of his car. Well him being the gentleman he is told me to stay in the car while he changed his tire, his car running the whole time. So by the time he finished changing his tire, he got back in the car & his car had died 😂 so we spent our first date walking 2 miles to my dorm room to get jumper cables & my truck 😂😂 & here we are almost 2 years later 😂

So wait. I dated my fair share of jerks in the past but it was all worth it when I met my husband. Wait for your best friend, wait for the guy that you cannot picture your life without. Wait for the guy that can make you laugh with so much ease. It’s worth the wait, I promise.

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